sometimes

Will you stay,
and help me
through this day?
Will you stay,
and help me
go far away?
For there looms
on the horizon,
mottled with purple
streaks of deserted dreams,
a cloud not as gentle
as the one
that caresses me now,
and a flicker of fear
takes the place of home
sometimes
and only you can douse
the flame before it envelops
me and the dying child
that took shelter
from the world
inside the hollow shell
that I am.

Knock before you enter,
please.
Sometimes I’m not me
on my own,
sometimes I lie,
sometimes I lie down
and cry,
sometimes I wish
for dreams that flew away
a long, long time ago,
sometimes I tear this shell apart
to try and look inside,
to see if something
lies within.
Still.

The waters swirl
in a strange way.
Sometimes I wish I wasn’t
a little boy trying to be a warrior.
Sometimes I wish I wasn’t.
Sometimes I wish I wasn’t.